Saturday, April 18, 2009

Is it OK to have my "ex" on my law of attraction vision board?

Hi secret sage,

I made this vision board wherein I placed everything that I wanted. I'm focusing more on the picture of me and my former boyfriend, getting back together and having a nice family. I'm feeling everything including him, as already mine and I'm grateful. The thing is I get to have dreams about him and the family that I am visualizing, is that okay?

Marj

Dear Marj,

There is nothing wrong with dreaming about your former boyfriend and getting back together and having a nice family. The only thing is that the law of attraction states that like vibrations attract each other which means that so long as he is the same "frequency" as you, you will likely be back together again. It could be soon. It could be 10 years from now (are you willing to wait that long?) or it could be never.

You can't use the law of attraction to manipulate another person to fall back in love with you. They have free will just like you do. You can, however, ask the Universe to bring you someone just like your ex (or your ex if he wishes to be with you) who WANTS to be in relationship with you. Then you have the best of both worlds. You get your ex OR someone BETTER!

Vision boards work very well as long as you are not attached to the outcome. So if you are willing for the Universe to bring you someone better than your boyfriend, they you're set! You will be successful. If, however, you feel you MUST have him and only him, then things may be difficult to manifest for you.

I think being in love with your boyfriend is a good thing only in that you can use the vibration of LOVE in your visualizing to manifest someone even better. Keep the feelings going, just don't attach yourself to your ex.

Blessings,
The Secret Sage

4 comments:

Sharann Alter said...

Hi Dr Karen. I am in the same situation. 6 months out of a LTR and I have done a lot of thinking and looking at myself. I would like to manifest my ex back into my life and have a new, fulfilling relationship with him. I see how I was the cause of a lot of issues and I am working on them.

I want to know how to approach my ex, what to say.

Recently he contacted me wanting to talk about what we've both been going through. We do both miss each other.

I am confused about the way forward. Do we talk about where we each went wrong in the past, do we keep things light hearted and friendly, do we tell each other how we really feel.

Lisalisa

Karen Kan, MD said...

Being truthful is always the way to go. Just don't attach an outcome to it. You both may need to grow more (or not) to be together in a healthy way. If you both are wanting contact, then that's great. Better to be honest and disappointed than to pretend.
Blessings,
Dr. Karen

Sharann Alter said...

Thanks Dr Karen,
He has been dating someone else for a few months now. Is it best for me to cut contact and say I can't accept just friendship right now despite him contacting me? I still have feelings for him.
He was the cause of a lot of issues too. I don't know if anything has changed for him. If he is genuinely only offering friendship, I have to find a way to move on. If he is ready for a committed relationship, I am open to it. Perhaps I am a fool for feeling this way when he is seeing someone else. I do want him to be happy.
Lisalisa

Sharann Alter said...

Thanks Dr Karen,
He has been dating someone for a few months now. I wonder if I am being foolish. He is the one contacting me. I know he is offering friendship only and I have told him I need time. I love this man. I know I am growing and changing. I don't know how to just be friends with this man. It hurts that he is with someone else.

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